Tuesday, May 10, 2011

These Are My Confessions

I am glad to see that I still have readers!  Thanks for keeping on coming back to visit my blog.  I will try not to leave you hanging so long next time.

Today I have some confessions I need to share.  Sometimes just saying them out loud/typing them on the keyboard helps relieve that pressure from carrying around those heavy thoughts.  Usually I keep things pretty light around here, but there has been a lot going on in my life lately.  I need to unload.  Most of them have to deal with my fitness and food goals, because that is where I am the naughtiest.

And although my confessions do not relate at all to the ones Usher is singing about here, I feel like it still helps to listen to the song.  Music Therapy - I am telling you,  its amazing!

So here we go...

1. I purposely skipped out on going to the gym for 12 days.  It wasn't because I wasn't feeling well, which might have been true at least one of those days.  I have many excuses, none of which are good enough.  This gym membership is supposed to be there to keep my accountable, but it isn't going to work if I just choose not to go because the weather is too nice out or I just want to sit at home on my computer.

2. I may have eaten at least 3 of these delicious margarita cupcakes, all at once and came back for more later.  My self control is almost zero, and I am an emotional eater.  These two factors do not work well together, and have caused me to be at a point I never wished to be at.

3. I am a bejeweled addict.  I blame the hubby.  He got me started and now I can't stop playing.  Sometimes I play so much and I just zone in that I am barely paying attention to what I am doing.

4. I have been sneaking Mt Dews. Sigh.  Not the throwbacks, but the bad-for-you regular Mt. Dews.  It is just so good.

5. I bought two dresses recently, knowing that it was probably going to make money tight at the end of the pay period.  I was right- money got tight, and I love my dresses.  Since I barely ever buy clothes for myself (despite what people may think by the way I talk) I will forgive myself entirely for this one.

6. I have been pulling away from friends and people out here in Columbia.  I know that it is 99% sure that we will be moving somewhere, we just don't know where yet.  It is hard to say goodbye so I have been pulling away from friendships to make it easier.

7. I know what I need to do to meet my fitness and food goals.  I just choose not to do it.  I am comfortable living like I do, this is how I have lived for 22 years.  Change is hard.  I even tried to tell myself this week that it isn't worth being in shape and healthy, and I almost believed myself.  I know what I need to do, but I need to keep that motivation going.

Well how is that for honesty?  That felt good.  This past week has been hard on me in many ways.  However, this week I have been more optimistic and have been trying harder to meet all my goals.  Nothing like getting started again! It's refreshing.  Glad we always have that option.


  1. It helps me to change the reasons I work out. It can't be about how we look or our dress size. Women gain weight as they age, anyway, no matter how much we exercise.

    The reason to have a healthy lifestyle is to live as long as possible to be with the ones we love, friends, husbands, future children and grandchildren. And rather than strenuous exercise, it can be just as rewarding to take sixty minute walks, eat extra vegetables (and a dessert!), stuff like that. Keep it simple and do it for all-around health, not a dress size.

    Good luck and thanks for sharing this. You are so NOT ALONE!!!!!! I do ALL of those same things!!!

  2. Thanks for the encouragement Mal! I agree that we have to look at it differently - more like a lifestyle change. But boy is it hard to get rid of those bad habits!